Capture Your Grief: Day 3 - Before

I suffered two early miscarriages prior to Gage's death.  I was extremely sad after each loss but can't compare those feelings with the emotions I felt and still feel everyday after losing Gage.  I feel like a part of me died the day I woke to find my 3 day old son lifeless. 

Before Gage I had my whole life planned out.  I always wanted to be married at a young age, finish college, and have multiple children. I was married at 18 and graduated from Nursing School 8 months pregnant with my first child.  I was happy and full of life. I truly thought that my life would play out exactly as I had planned.  I enjoyed my career as a nurse. I enjoyed my growing family. I looked forward to things.....time with family/friends, vacations, hobbies. I never thought I would lose a child, especially to SIDS.

I became a different person the day Gage died. There are parts of that person I wish I could get back.  I would never go back to that life.  Although Gage only lived 3 short days he made an impact that will last in our lives forever.  I can't imagine my life without him. #captureyourgrief #whathealsyourheart

Capture Your Grief is a mindful healing project for anyone who is grieving the death of a baby or child of any age or gestation. If you are not grieving the death of a child but a loved one and would like to raise awareness for the bereaved parents community, we welcome you to take part as well to help us spread the word about our community. For more information visit CarlyMarie Project Heal at  http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/2014/09/capture-your-grief-2014.html